One Week to Go

A week away from surgery and surprisingly I’m feeling pretty good. I know that at this time next week I will have been through the surgery and will know first-hand exactly what I am in for in regards to recovery – and pain – that and/or I’ll be completely whacked on pain medication.

It’s strange, though… as I get closer to surgery I feel like I am more at ease with the idea of it in some ways. Maybe I am just accepting the fact that I am going to be cut into and have my innards rearranged? Maybe I am accepting the fact that I am going to be hurting and tired for a while afterwards? Maybe I am accepting the fact that adapting to the completely new way of eating is going to be very tough? Or maybe I’ll just freak out the morning of surgery? Ha! I believe however, that I truly have started to consider the end results more than ever. This is not about “the surgery” as it were. Really, this is about finally gaining control over a part of my life which I have never been able to control. This is exciting…

I finished reading through my official bariatric surgery handbook – or as I think of it: “User Manual for the Formerly Large Jim – How to Maintain your New Jim Model.” I kid, I kid. The book is extremely informative and will take me step by step into my new eating lifestyle. It gives me tricks on how to get in 60 grams of protein when I will barely be able to keep down a shot glass of water. It tells me what foods to avoid so I don’t uncontrollably shit my pants (for real – I love you barbeque sauce but fuck off). It talks about how to be aware that I may trade my bad eating habits for “new” bad habits like sex addiction. Well, joke’s on you, Fat Manual - I am already addicted to sex! Heh…

Moving on… aside from being over a week without soda - which is going very well by the way - I have started to change/apply some habits that are going to help me post-surgery. For instance, I am consciously trying to eat slower and chew more thoroughly. Now, I have always been a fast eater, which of course is a contributing factor to my weight. I have been told several times in the last few years that slowing down and stretching meals out will help me recognize when I’m full and will ultimately help me lose weight. Well, you wouldn’t believe how hard that is to do when you have eaten like a Marine colonel your whole life (yeah, I don’t know why either). I really need to change this now, because post surgery eating too fast can lead to vomiting – and I hate to vomit. Along with this I have tried to refrain from drinking while eating a meal. Post-surgery this is a must – no drinking 20 minutes before, during, and after meals. This helps to keep food in my new smaller stomach longer so I can feel full and get the full nutritional benefits from the said meal. This is another one of those habits that is going to be difficult to break. Beverages with my meals have just been the way it is for me – always.

I’ve also been thinking a bit more about the likelihood that I will have some extra skin once I lose a bunch of weight – in fact it is almost certain. Now, I have always known this and to be honest it doesn’t bother me too much – at least not now. My focus is getting the weight off for health reasons. Cosmetically I am not going to be out trying to show my body off to the ladies – I have a wonderful wife who loves the chub that I currently am. I doubt a little extra skin will make her run off. If that was the case, some of my other faults would have sent her packing long ago. That said I am aware that there are some basic things I can do to help my skin shrink back naturally – well, as much as it can after being stretched out for 30 years. I have age on my side. Being fairly young assures the fact that my skin is still more apt to reshape than if I would have chosen to do this at 45-50 years old and beyond. Secondly, I know that weight training for toning is going to help my skin some and I plan on starting a resistance training routine as soon as I can after surgery. Lastly – moisturizing! Thankfully my wife is an expert in this field. So, I have added body moisturizing after showering to keep myself soft and pliable (that’s right ladies – day-dream away – haha!). I need to get some stuff that’s a little less girly smelling as I am currently using Tess’ Bath & Body Works lotions and body creams. Something with cocoa butter will help pull the skin back in and is good for any stretch marks/scars as well, or so I’ve read. I will be employing the cocoa butter love soon. This adds a good 10 minutes to my morning rougtine, but if it will help my skin to not drag on the ground then I will make it habit.

Oh, and I picked up some slippers at Target for the hospital stay this evening. First pair of slippers I have owned since I was a kid… hmm! One week to go before I make one of the biggest changes in my life… but change is already happening and I’m ready!